Things may seem bad now, but don't use a permanent solution for temporary problems. You're such a wonderful person. Smile - it's beautiful. Not to get all cheesy, but we can't truly appreciate the good without first experiencing the bad. It's not so clear when you're in the midst of the bad but having been through some shit, I promise it gets better. You're strong and you can overcome this. Don't let anyone make you feel like you're not good enough because you are.